A Guide to Representing North Korea in Model UN

I have twice represented the DPRK in Model UN conferences. I don’t know how this reflects on my personality, but I won awards both times.

Having graduated the circuit, I leave behind this guide for all who dare walk the same path.

Attacks

Here are phrases for use on your opponents, inspired by actual North Korean communications. The list is arranged in ascending order of spiciness.

Alternative Titles for the Supreme Leader

Saying “Glorious Leader,” “Supreme Leader,” etc repeatedly can be tedious. Here is a list of synonyms for the Dear Leader:

Resolution / Directive Ideas

These are loosely credited to actual North Korean law. Your goal is to encode them into international law.

Quoting the Great Leader

If a powerful quote was made by anyone, it was surely imagined by the Great Leader first. Attribute all important quotations to Kim Jong-un to clarify this for other delegates.

Example: “As Kim Jong-un first said…”

Backroom

In a crisis committee, while you’re regaling your peers front-room, you probably want to invade Japan or South Korea back-room.

If anyone raises concerns, redirect attention with the tools above, accusing other delegates of treachery.

Once you have attained foreign territory and declared Greater Korea, threaten to nuke anyone who interferes with your new regions. Then figure out how to irrevocably change committee by some absurd action, such as blowing up the moon. This is typically how I won crisis as North Korea.

Esteemed delegate, with these techniques, I hope you will smack the Yankees and make the Guiding Sun Ray proud. Remember your right of reply.

Structures that everyone should aspire to construct.

Interested in a wide variety of things — you may catch me jumping from writing about fiction to derivatives trading.

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